Declaration Of Independence of the USA and a Turtle in a zoo in India

A news story I saw on CNN this morning, that had me laugh my ass out while leaving for work..

*********************************
WHOOSH!.......CNN NEWS FLASH....
COMING UP....Can you think of anyone who died this week but was also alive during the Declaration of Independence in the USA?(Images of a fluttering American Flag)....No??..Well we can!....Stay with us.......Commercial Break.

WHOOOOOSH!...........BACK
A turtle from a zoo in India died yesterday, and is believed to be two hundred and fifty years old!...which means, he was actually present at the time when the declaration of independence was signed in Philadelphia.so now you know who was alive in 1776!....Moving on......

*********************************

LMAO

Google Gujju !!!

Part of Google's effort to provide international language interfaces to the Google hompepage. The Gujurati homepage rocks! Check out what the link for the usual button for 'Im Feeling Lucky!" say.

"Aaje Naseeb Saru Chhe!"

Google Gujurati Saru Chhe!

"Somebody..!" Update

I am in! Finally bought the tickets to the show. My excitement took a slight blow, when me and my friend Sarabjit were selecting the seats in the theatre while booking the tickets online. We ended up getting the last row seats of the upper gallery. *Sigh*.

Somebody..Its me!

Well its none other than me gettin excited, and its none other than Russell Peters coming to town! As it stands right now, I am going for the show. 3 days to go and tickets are not bought yet. The reason being, certain work schedules have to be managed.

Just thought I would keep updating the status on this here. And if all works well, youll get a first-hand review of his live act!

If you haven't heard about him...
1) You suck.
2) Here's a link

Till then.....Somebody...!

"Somebody...!"

"Somebody is excited real baaaad......Somebody"
Keep checking this blog out for more!

Shaun Pollock: Up, Close and Personal ;-)

Location: Mumbai International Airport, Terminal 2A

Exact Location: Travelex Foreign Exchange Counter, Departure Lounge.

When: 29th November 2005, 1.15 am

Doing what: Exchanging currency.

.........

Me: Hey Shaun, tough luck today.

Shaun: Yeah.

Me: You flying back to Joburg?

Shaun: Yup yup.

Me: So when are you coming back. Anytime soon?

Shaun: Ohh I don't know, but can't wait to come back!..I swear to god!

Me: Oh I am sure they can't wait too!

Shaun: Alright, Cheers!

Me: Bye.
......
Hehehehe

Finally

Ohkay! its been more than 3 months since I made that 'Alternate History' post. I have no reason whatsoever for not replying to any of the comments made. Considering the huge gap, I think it was fitting to post my replies as a new post altogether.

So here it is....

Thank you people, thank you so much for writing in.

AVINASH, firstly, I don't know which particular section of my post made you think that I am anguished at the writer, or about the fact that he used Gandhi...I am not. I am sure he is a 'very nice guy' like you said. And since you seem to share some kind of a Texan liasion with him, just wanted to make sure he is still fine and nice.... Getting back to my post, the whole idea was to air my disgust at the whole concept of Alternate History. And why shouldn't I fill myself with hate for something that i sincerely...err...hate? I'll say this every day of the week...Alternate History is crappy and sickening.

And yes, dont ask me to calm down man...You can't...No one can. I hope you realize that this is my blog, my space and what i write in here is what I think. Voice your opinions, if you will, i love that...but dont ask me to calm down on my territory.

SAURABH, Of course I love the imaginative movies man, and who would know better than you? Isn't watching movies is something we did as a daily ritual in our roommate years?...The point I am trying to make is 'keep it off history' . Let aside Alternate History, even historical inaccuracies are frustrating. And that is the very reason why movies like Alexander and Mangal Pandey failed.

Rax, Yags, Raf, Kau....like you see, not many people think like you guys and me. Sad.

Back

3 months, 3 days.
Thats the longest time between posts I've ever had. And at this moment I am just glad that I am making this post, which will make sure it doesn't get any longer....

I was plannin to write something a few days back, and I was working on trying to provide certain reasons of the absence.

Didn't get any then.
Don't have any now.

Atleast I'm back :D

Alternate History...WTF!

The spark:

A few days back I was trying to search the web for eyewitness stories of Mahatma Gandhi's assassination. I happened to reach a blog by Mr. Taylor , which had a post on Gandhi's assassination. Here's what the post said :

"Indian revolutionary Mohandas Gandhi was assassinated as he attempted to foment rebellion against British rule among the Hindus of New Delhi. Randall Stodderly, the British soldier who shot Gandhi, was arrested by Indian authorities, but when he was extradited to Great Britain, he was freed and feted as a hero."

Thinking it to be just a ordinary brief on Gandhi's assassination (which was not something I was looking for)... I was about to close the page and move on, while suddenly my brain forced me to ponder twice on this post. My head shook, my eyes widened while my mind came to terms with what I was reading.

Gandhi murdered by a British soldier??!!....because he formented rebellion??!...WTF!.....Without even caring to trying to think over what was written, I blasted off an e-mail to the author, begging to point his attention over his erroneous post.

The reply:

He replied within hours. This is what he had to say..

"This is an event in history that didn't happen - my site is fictional, not historical. Alternate history is a type of science fiction that sometimes takes real people and events and shows them slightly different (or sometimes very different). In that particular timeline, I believe, Gandhi, instead of embracing non-violence, had chosen the path of violent resistance to British rule."

The Aftershock:
I fumed endlessly. The next thing I was doing was googling 'Alternate History'. Many websites (if not hundreds, thousands or millions) were dedicated to Alternate history. I started thinking as to what kind of people would like to actually spend time writing Alternate history and then I was pitying people who spend time and enjoy reading it. If you are one of them. Please e-mail me!

Words from the wise me:

History is truth. I love history. It is exciting to read about how men, women, leaders and nations lived through the old era and shaped the foundation of the world that we have today.
I am no book critic. Nor am I a literary genius, but I understand what makes sense and what doesn't. And on any given day, reading about gandhi's life would give me a better literary orgasm than going through pages that describe Gandhi's transformation into a terrorist.
Alternate history is a lie, reading it doesn't serve any purpose and doesn't provide any breakfast for the brains.

On this day, I declare myself an 'Anti Alternate History' ian.

And to all you alternate historians....if you really want to 'alter' things, leave history alone. How about altering the present? Write about George Bush and Osama Bin Laden getting together, and having a coffee at the neighbourhood Starbucks and making plans about a ' Bush-Laden Center of Peace Development'.

Now that will be an interesting read eh?

euphoriastringband.com

Like the Indian band 'Euphoria'? Like the Pakistani band 'Strings'?

http://www.euphoriastringband.com


Good?

A Pilot's view with Google Earth!

Want to simulate a plane landing at the Newark Liberty International Airport??

Follow these simple steps:

1) Download Google Earth.

2) In the search bar punch in 'EWR'. Which is the airport code for Newark Airport.

3) Once your view zooms in to the street level of the airport, look for the runway (slightly north of the terminals)

4) Shift the view using <> arrows to get the runway at the center.

5) Using the tilt function, tilt your angular view to something like 15 degrees from ground level.

6) Zoom out your view till the altitude reaches 36,000 feet.(Usual flying height of passenger airplanes)

7) And now, you are all set to land!...Begin zooming in towards the airport till you zoom in close enough to touch the runway...Don't you feel like a pilot?

Guess who Udit Narayan ran into!

Udit Narayan wass on a US tour in June. After finishing his last leg of performances in Houston, Udit was supposed to take the flight back to Mumbai from the New York Airport. While he was coming in from Houston, his wife and son (who chose to vacation in FLorida) were coming down in another flight from Florida....Udit now had the mammoth task of trying to gather all the luggage and board the Air India from terminal B....The humongous peice of a land that the airport is, Udit was clearly clueless....

....Till he approached, a young indian man walking on the concourse with a coffee in his hand....His name was Vikram Desai. Vikram was visiting his office branch at the airport. Udit asked for help, Vikram obliged...:)

Udit couldnt beleive his luck..Vikram spent an hour with him, talking about everything from Karan Johar to Kumar Sanu....

After VIkram took him through the whole ordeal in a smooth fashion, Vikram and Udit exchanged business cards...Udit asked Vikram, if he could call him the next time he is in the US....

Udit then asked for a picture with Vikram......Viks obliged ;)

USPS messes up

This has to be one of the sickest displays of postal accuracy that I have seen.

The scanned image that you see above is that of an envelope which I had to mail out to Radhika. All of you would agree with me that my handwriting on there is legible if not neat. Like any mailer would, I conveniently jotted the 'To' and 'From' addresses.
I mailed this out on monday morning, and to my shock i get the envelope back in my mail on Tuesday! I tried to examine the envelope, making sure I had the right postage affixed and if there were any other discrepancies.

But no!...it's just a mailing office error....I am still trying to figure out the reason for this. I see no reason whatsoever in why any mailer in the world would drop this envelope to the 'From' address, which, as a matter of fact is simply scribbled on such a small corner of the envelope?

Any answers? ....guesses?...words of wisdom?

NY loses out 2012 Olympics bid

In spite of a vast NYC 2012 campaign, NY lost out on the bid to host the 2012 Olympics.
This is what U.S representative Anthony Weiner said,

" We already are at the center of the universe. We don't need the International Olympic Committee to determine that for us"

Ouch!

It always rains on my Birthday!

The night of July 4th 2005, I was just pondering about something...and I thought I would blog about it , so here we go ....

June 7th is the day the gods decided to let me have a look at the world. Since that day, every year on this day I have celebrated my birthday with great enthusiasm and vivacity. This is one day for which I try to start day dreaming about months in advance. I have never tried to gauge if others too are that ecstatic about their birthdays, I know I am.

I know a couple of guys for whom their birthday is nothing to wait for or be excited about. It just baffles me how they have that long look on their face and they try to tell everyone that this is just another day for them. I feel like holding them by their collar and shaking them forward and backward a hundred times.

Me: ....CMAAAAAAAAN!.....its your birthday for heaven's sake!!!!
Them: So?
Me: Aaargghhh..

Well this long intro has nothing to do with the point I am trying to make here. I was just trying to point out as to how zealous I am on this day.

Coming back to the point, for 2X straight years, I have celebrated my birthdays....in different places, with different bunch of friends at times, in hotels, in pubs, at my own home in Mumbai and Surat, in the exotic islands of Mauritius, in Philadelphia and in NYC. No matter how much I try to make my celebrations 'new' or 'different' , there is something that happens each time on my birthday. It rains.

According to my mom, it even rained heavily in Mumbai, minutes after I was born.

My late granny called me an avatar of Lord Krishna.....while another friend of mine to whom I told this tale, claimed that the gods don't like me and hence cried every year on my birthday.

I will go with my granny's version. *Winks*

Do Math or Starve!!

Thomas Friedman of The New York Times....

" When we were young kids growing up in America, we were told to eat our vegetables at dinner and not leave them. Mothers said, 'think of the starving children in India and finish the dinner'. And now I tell my children : ' Finish your math homework. Think of the children in India who would make you starve, if you don't!'"

Domino's Ltd.

This morning I received a mail from the nearby Domino's Pizza outlet.

Dear Sir,

We would like to offer you the following deals to thank you for your business with us in the past few months:

Deal 1:.....
Deal 2:............
Deal 3: A large pizza with unlimited toppings (up to 5) for
just $ 8.99


Hehehehe.....

Birthday, Work and a Visa!

On June 7th 2005, I got my H1B Visa. This visa lets me live and work in the United States for a period of six years.

It was the best birthday present I could have ever received. My excitement is too much to be described in written form. But I am gonna write something about it obviously.

During the course of the past few months I was bombarded by help, advise and suggestions all the time. Friends, relatives, parents...all of them geared up to give me what they thought was 'much needed' advise. It was funny how I heard all kind different things about the whole H1B visa process from everyone.

Lets begin!

4th Feb 2005- My Boss
Me: Will the company sponsor a H1B visa for me?
He: What is that?
Me: You see, to work with this company, I need to have a work visa, the employer files a petition the US Govt. to issue me a visa. It's basically paperwork, and you have to sign on a few places, agreeing that you need a foreign worker, and that I am better suited to this job than my American counterparts.
He: So...all I have to do is sign........ummm...thats fine!
Me: Phew!

7th Feb 2005 - A distant relative in Florida.
Me: Hey!, my company agreed to file my H1!!
He: Oh, are you sure you will get it though?
Me: Why? If the employer is on my side, what else do I need?
He: Still man, your company has to be a multinational company with atleast five thousand employees.
Me: *Duh*

18th Feb 2005 - My roommate
Me: Hey, do you know a nice immigration lawyer? I need someone to file my H1 visa on behalf of my company.
He: The one's I know only handle high-profile cases.
Me: Ohhh..I see....(*Duh*)

1st March 2005- My Mom.
Me: Mom, will I get my H1 visa? I am kind of tensed about the whole thing, there is so much to be done...
She: You'll be fine beta....god is with u, your good times have started, nothing can stop you..
Me: Hmmmm

13th April 2005 - My lawyer
Me: ...blah..blah..blah.....this is my case, what do you think?
He: Ho jaayega, no problem.
Me: What about the salary, is it in line with the prevailing wages?
He: Ya ya, even if it is not, we will find a way, don't worry, ho jaayega!
Me: And, I transferred my engineering course from India and completed my degree here..Is that fine?
He: Ya ya, not a problem, ho jaayega!
Me: The company?
He: Ho jaayega!
Me: The position? The degree?
He: Just send me all the documents, I'll do it, its a straight forward case, ho jayega!
Me: Cooool Mannnnn!!

27th April 2005 -- A relative in India
She: Vicky beta..H1 nu shu thayu??
Me: The procedure is on aunty. In a month, I should be ready to file.
She: Ohh...dont worry beta, even if you don't get it, there are lot of girls in New Jersey that i know. Just marry any U.S. Citizen , and then no tenstion for the rest of the life!
Me: Ya ok.

13th May 2005-- My lawyer
He: Arre, there is a small problem, your wages have to be ______ for satisfying labor conditions.
Me: Ohh, alright, I'll talk to my boss, should'nt be a problem.
He: Cool, let me know.
Me: Ok cool.....err wait.....if that condition is satisfied then.....
He: (interrupts)....then to HO JAAYEGA!, no problems!!!
Me: Ya right.


1st June 2005 (On the eve of applying) -- A friend of my roommate
Me: Tomorrow I am applying for my H1 visa.
He: Why are you applying?
Me: What do you mean?
He: Your application will be rejected!
Me: No it wont!!.. what the f*** do you mean?
He: The USCIS stopped accepting applications for fiscal year 2006.
Me: No they did naaat!!??
He: Yes they did! You can go ahead and apply if you want to. You will get a letter in three days saying your application was rejected.
Me: We'll see.

7th June 2005, 10.00 am EST -- My mom
She: Happy birhtday Beta!...how's your day going??
Me: Its goin great....but I just wish I did not have to wait for a few more days for the approval to come in. I could have had a real blast had my visa approval come in today!
She: Something tells me, you will get your visa today.
Me: Hahaha, how I wish you were right .....the USCIS website says it takes anywhere between 10-15 days. So its gonna be atleast more 5 or 6 days mom.
She: You wait and watch.
Me: Hahaha, ok!

7th June 2005, 4.00 pm (EST) -- My boss's e-mail

This is what I think it is...Correct??..CONGRATULATIONS!!.....

".............This case has been approved....."
Me: YooohoooO!!!!

EliteTorrents.org shut down by the FBI

Possibly the biggest torrent site on the web, EliteTorrents.org was shut down by the FBI. EliteTorrents had the movie 'Star Wars' posted on their site six hours before its official release. The FBI says that 10,000 downloads of the movie took place in those six hours.

Click here to see the official message posteb by the FBI on the EliteTorrents website.

MPAA (Motion Picture Association of America) says Hollywood loses 3.5 billion dollars every year due to illegal downloads, mostly through torrent sites and P2P sharing networks.

Torrent sites have escaped the clutches of the FBI so far, since they argue that the files are not actually posted on their site

Lose it...Find it...Boomerang It!!

Now!....This is one interesting service that I came across (although I am still unsure if its really worth it). It's called BoomerangIt. The whole idea is to tag all your prized possessions and in the event of a loss, the person who finds it can easily report it on their website. They then take care of collecting it and shipping it back to you.

Everyday, an average business traveller is being accessorized by all kinds of gadgetry. Laptops, PDA's, cell-phones, Mini DV camcorders, digital cameras, travel scanners are the business travellers' best friends. With the advent of compact memory cards and drives, the idea of 'travelling with data' is exploding in every sense. It's not a bad idea after all to have everything tagged. The website claims that their tagging system can help you find everything from watches to boats.

The only problem that I see with this is that your item has to be found by a 'good samaritan'.