Craziest Conversation : No. 3 (2005)
This has to be my conversation with the rep from PNC Bank. I had talked about this in my previous post. You can find the entire transcript of this conversation here.
Craziest Conversation: No.2 (2003)
She: Citibank Card Center....How can I help you.
Me: Hello, I just received this letter from Citibank today that my student credit card application has been rejected because I am not a U.S. Citizen.
She: Ok sir; let me pull up your information in my system
After verifying my information and looking up my details in her system she had this to say
She: Sir, your student credit card application has been rejected because you are not a U.S. Citizen.
Me: Duh!...Yes Maam I know that, the thing that is written in your system is also on my letter here.
She: So how can I help you?
Me: Well, I am international student and it says on your website that this card that I applied for can also be issued to International Students.
She: What visa do you have?
Me: I am on an international student visa
She: See? You are not a U.S. Citizen.
Me: Aargh, yeah I know, but isn'€™t this card also issued to International Students.
She: It's not issued to anyone except U.S. Citizens sir.
Me: Then why does it say that on your website?
She: I am sure it'™s a mistake sir, I am sure they will rectify it.
Me: Huh? I for sure know that all my friends have this card, and they are international students, and theyre NOT U.S. Citizens.
She: Then I think it'€™s a fraud case sir, we will have someone follow up on that.
Me: So you are saying that no one apart from U.S. Citizens, like international students, skilled workers and other immigrants have a credit cards here?
She: Not if they are not U.S Citizens.
I disconnected the phone and called back after five minutes. This time I spoke to a different rep and she accepted that it was their mistake since they put my application in the wrong system. She said that my application was now accepted and it will be further processed.
Foreign accented customer service reps are all over the place now. If you end up having a nice conversation with one of them, it is quite likely that they would in fact disclose their location. India it seems is the favorite country for companies here to set up their call centers. I was in India when the BPO and Call Center industry was actually booming. I in fact had a lot of friends who went under training to join these call centers. The conversation below was with a telemarketing associate from India
So here we go......Numbaah One!!!! (2004)
Me: Yelloww!
She: Hello sir, I am calling from Government Grants and Loans, you have been selected by the federal government to receive at least eight thousand dollars in grants.
Me: Waaaat?? Holy shit!!..Yoohoo!....I knew god was going to reward me some day! So where can I collect the money from?
She: Sir you will have to register with us. Once you do that we will send you an application packet and you should be receiving the money any where between six and 12 months.
Me: Cool!!, I am ready to register!
She: Ok sir, all I need is your bank checking account number, your bank routing number and your home address.
Me: You need my bank account number? Why?
She: Actually we will be withdrawing an amount of two hundred and fifty dollars from your account, that is just about three percent of your total grant money.
Me: Oh, so the government wants me to pay money to get the money?
She: No sir, we charge these small fees so that every thing is right with your application. If due to some reason you do not receive this grant money after eighteen months we will refund you this money.
( By this point, I realized that this was a scam. Also I figured out that the person I was talking to was located in India)
Me: Oh ok. But why did the federal government select me to get the money? I’m not even a U.S. Citizen!
She: Ohh..You'™re not!?....Err€...ok...gimme a second here.....Alright, sir, do you pay your taxes regularly?
Me: Taxes? Yea sure! Very regularly.
She: That means you are a U.S. Citizen!
Me: Wow! Am I ? I had no idea..Can I vote in the forthcoming presidential elections?
She: Sir for that you will have to talk to your local municipal office.
(I was ready to end this now)
Me: Maam, you are doing a good job, but this is not India and there is no municipal office here! I know this is a scam, if there is any way by which I can get the grant money without investing a single dollar that's the only way in which I am gonna go ahead with this.
She: Disconnected the phone, I never heard from them again.
But let me not take away anything from the efforts of hundreds and thousands of these tech support, customer support and customer service representatives worldwide. I have talked to some really cool, interesting and intelligent people this way. I think they do a tremendous job. I am sure that solving any kind of customer problems only on the phone is definitely a tedious job. But yes, I still agree with the professor. Not exactly with his belief that there is a disaster waiting to happen, but yes these reps should stop depending too much on their ‘systems’.
Let me end this post with one of the funniest gigs that I've ever come across on T.V. This was on the Late Night Show with Conan O'€™ Brian. Its about how one of the guys in their office ends up talking to a tech support associate from India and then actually goes all the way to India to get his computer fixed. Its funny, its worth a million laughs and it’s a must watch. Hats off to the writers of the show.
Click here to see the entire show.
You will need Windows Media Player to play the video. Click here to download it
In the meanwhile, please feel free to comment and suggest on my ideas and also share any of your similar experiences!
This has to be my conversation with the rep from PNC Bank. I had talked about this in my previous post. You can find the entire transcript of this conversation here.
Craziest Conversation: No.2 (2003)
She: Citibank Card Center....How can I help you.
Me: Hello, I just received this letter from Citibank today that my student credit card application has been rejected because I am not a U.S. Citizen.
She: Ok sir; let me pull up your information in my system
After verifying my information and looking up my details in her system she had this to say
She: Sir, your student credit card application has been rejected because you are not a U.S. Citizen.
Me: Duh!...Yes Maam I know that, the thing that is written in your system is also on my letter here.
She: So how can I help you?
Me: Well, I am international student and it says on your website that this card that I applied for can also be issued to International Students.
She: What visa do you have?
Me: I am on an international student visa
She: See? You are not a U.S. Citizen.
Me: Aargh, yeah I know, but isn'€™t this card also issued to International Students.
She: It's not issued to anyone except U.S. Citizens sir.
Me: Then why does it say that on your website?
She: I am sure it'™s a mistake sir, I am sure they will rectify it.
Me: Huh? I for sure know that all my friends have this card, and they are international students, and theyre NOT U.S. Citizens.
She: Then I think it'€™s a fraud case sir, we will have someone follow up on that.
Me: So you are saying that no one apart from U.S. Citizens, like international students, skilled workers and other immigrants have a credit cards here?
She: Not if they are not U.S Citizens.
I disconnected the phone and called back after five minutes. This time I spoke to a different rep and she accepted that it was their mistake since they put my application in the wrong system. She said that my application was now accepted and it will be further processed.
Foreign accented customer service reps are all over the place now. If you end up having a nice conversation with one of them, it is quite likely that they would in fact disclose their location. India it seems is the favorite country for companies here to set up their call centers. I was in India when the BPO and Call Center industry was actually booming. I in fact had a lot of friends who went under training to join these call centers. The conversation below was with a telemarketing associate from India
So here we go......Numbaah One!!!! (2004)
Me: Yelloww!
She: Hello sir, I am calling from Government Grants and Loans, you have been selected by the federal government to receive at least eight thousand dollars in grants.
Me: Waaaat?? Holy shit!!..Yoohoo!....I knew god was going to reward me some day! So where can I collect the money from?
She: Sir you will have to register with us. Once you do that we will send you an application packet and you should be receiving the money any where between six and 12 months.
Me: Cool!!, I am ready to register!
She: Ok sir, all I need is your bank checking account number, your bank routing number and your home address.
Me: You need my bank account number? Why?
She: Actually we will be withdrawing an amount of two hundred and fifty dollars from your account, that is just about three percent of your total grant money.
Me: Oh, so the government wants me to pay money to get the money?
She: No sir, we charge these small fees so that every thing is right with your application. If due to some reason you do not receive this grant money after eighteen months we will refund you this money.
( By this point, I realized that this was a scam. Also I figured out that the person I was talking to was located in India)
Me: Oh ok. But why did the federal government select me to get the money? I’m not even a U.S. Citizen!
She: Ohh..You'™re not!?....Err€...ok...gimme a second here.....Alright, sir, do you pay your taxes regularly?
Me: Taxes? Yea sure! Very regularly.
She: That means you are a U.S. Citizen!
Me: Wow! Am I ? I had no idea..Can I vote in the forthcoming presidential elections?
She: Sir for that you will have to talk to your local municipal office.
(I was ready to end this now)
Me: Maam, you are doing a good job, but this is not India and there is no municipal office here! I know this is a scam, if there is any way by which I can get the grant money without investing a single dollar that's the only way in which I am gonna go ahead with this.
She: Disconnected the phone, I never heard from them again.
But let me not take away anything from the efforts of hundreds and thousands of these tech support, customer support and customer service representatives worldwide. I have talked to some really cool, interesting and intelligent people this way. I think they do a tremendous job. I am sure that solving any kind of customer problems only on the phone is definitely a tedious job. But yes, I still agree with the professor. Not exactly with his belief that there is a disaster waiting to happen, but yes these reps should stop depending too much on their ‘systems’.
Let me end this post with one of the funniest gigs that I've ever come across on T.V. This was on the Late Night Show with Conan O'€™ Brian. Its about how one of the guys in their office ends up talking to a tech support associate from India and then actually goes all the way to India to get his computer fixed. Its funny, its worth a million laughs and it’s a must watch. Hats off to the writers of the show.
Click here to see the entire show.
You will need Windows Media Player to play the video. Click here to download it
In the meanwhile, please feel free to comment and suggest on my ideas and also share any of your similar experiences!
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